Black Lives Matter

First of all, I would like to say that I have paying a lot of attention to how I use my voice on other social media platforms, I have been neglecting to use my voice on my blog and I want to apologize to my readers for now speaking out here sooner. I am an ally of the black community and the Black Lives Matter Movement. I am working to educate myself on racial inequality, white supremacy, white privilege, police brutality, and many other topics necessary for me to fully understand my ignorance. I refuse to be ignorant any more. I refuse to not understand how my ignorance has aided in the oppression of my black brothers and sisters right under my nose. I have been speaking out on every social media platform I have an account on in an effort to keep the topic alive and keep people from forgetting that the people will not rest until justice is in order. I have also been making sure I sign petitions and donate in whatever capacity I can to help.

This blog does not tolerate hatred. It does not tolerate racism, hatred, ignorance, Trump, or any of the vermin in the government who support him. If you are someone who tolerates or supports anything I just listed, please either listen with an open mind with the intent of changing your ways, or leave immediately. I don’t need people like that and I don’t want people like that on this platform. I am not saying that in order to enjoy my blog you have to agree with everything I say. That could not be further from the truth. But when it comes to the issues of today and the Black Lives Matter Movement, anyone who does not support this post has no right to be here. My blog is a safe and loving space and it will not be tarnished by ignorance. I am done standing by and allowing people with gross values get away with publicly hating black people and other people of color because they just can’t understand how to be good people.

Our nation is hurting. People are dying because of the color of their skin. America has been plagued with racism since it’s gruesome founding hundreds of years ago. Our was founded on genocide, slavery, and cruelty. And the fact that we are still keeping up with these ideals today is sickening. I am disgusted that I live in a country where it is considered taboo or shocking to be standing up for racial justice. How have we become so skewed as a society that we allow this? Our nation is sick. Our justice system is malignant. We must fight to free American citizens of color from the systemic oppression that has been in place for 4oo years too long. We are done letting the system own the people. It’s time the people do something about the system.

Please consider streaming the video in the link below. Zoe Amira has created a video that features black artists and the ad revenue from it is going to support Black Lives Matter. Her video has inspired countless others to create similar videos and donate all ad revenue to the movement. It’s a way to contribute financially if you are low on funds. It’s a way to contribute if you aren’t low on funds. Either way, there is nothing but good that can come from taking time out of your day to stream these videos.

Video by YouTuber Zoe Amira

Changing Your Outlook on Health and Exercising

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Featured Post

Don’t let your mind bully your body.

June Tomaso Wood

I never in my life imagined that I would become a regular gym goer. I would rather stay at home and read or watch Netflix than take the time to go to the gym and exercise. I hated gym class in school and I would rather be anywhere else. As 2019 came to an end, I was thinking about what kind of resolutions I should make for the new year. I could go for losing weight, socializing more, improve my finances, get a promotion… the list is endless. There were so many things going through my brain before I realized what I wanted to do. I decided for 2020, I was going to love myself more. This can mean so many things. It can be eating healthier, exercising regularly, meditating, doing things to reduce anxiety and stress, spending time with people and activities that make me happy. The toughest one of these for me to achieve would be exercising regularly. Not that I physically couldn’t do it but psychologically, I put so much negativity on exercise and my body and associated it with feeling embarrassed about my size and didn’t want anyone to judge me. But part of loving myself more is breaking through these self-made barriers and exploring the world and myself beyond my own personal limitations.

Once I was a week into 2020, I decided to map out how to make all of these self-loving activities more realistic. What exactly would I do to put this plan into action? Step one: sign up for a gym. With spending the money as an extra incentive to go regularly, I went to a local gym and handed over my debit card. I was a little nervous at first but I needed to remind myself that everyone starts somewhere. I need to ease myself into my workouts to really get the hang of it. And before I knew it, my sessions were getting longer, I was going almost every day, and I was beginning to see results. I was so motivated. And it all came from looking to love myself more. And then came another incentive. The show I was working on had a giant turn-table as a set with two kitchens and a second-story bedroom and I was the primary operator of this. The more that got added to it, the heavier it got. I was so worried about making sure the show could happen smoothly and my fitness actually became a big part of this. The more I worked on my body, the easier turning the set became. And sometimes I didn’t realize how impressive this was until others tried to move it and were shocked at “how easy I made it look”.

This new confidence really pushed me to keep going until my gym and all others in the area were closed due to the coronavirus. It’s been hard to maintain staying physical at home because I didn’t realize how much I relied on the equipment and atmosphere of the gym to get me in the right spirit. I didn’t realize how much I would struggle to adapt to life and exercising during quarantine, so every new thing I try, I do with the hopes of distracting myself from the struggles of this time in the world and in that way, I am loving myself too. Being in quarantine isn’t fun and is pretty depressing. No wonder myself and so many people are struggling to find ways to stay active when the world is in such a dark place. That being said, I try to make sure I am doing as much at home as possible. I have been going for walks around my neighborhood, doing core and strength exercises that don’t require any equipment, and I have even tried my hand at yoga! I have a lot to learn in terms of keeping up with the strength and balance of yoga but I am looking forward to improving. I really do miss the gym but I love staying safe and healthy even more.

Regardless of the highs and lows of life, we need to take care of our bodies and love ourselves. I learned that in trying to love myself more, the gym stopped being a chore. I stopped seeing exercise as a miserable activity and that I needed to lose weight asap. While the goal still is to lose weight, I noticed that there is so much more to exercise than losing weight. In taking the approach of loving myself, I saw each step on the treadmill as a step towards outrunning any anxieties I had in the past. I saw each strength exercise as an opportunity to build up my strength and push passed any barriers life brought my way. I am so grateful for this new mindset towards health and as soon as the health crisis has ended and the gyms are open again, I will be back on track to continuing my journey.

You deserve to feel good as hell. We all deserve to feel good as hell.

Lizzo

Post-Grad Life: What I Wish I Knew Before Graduating

I was in school for eighteen years of my life. Eighteen f***ing years. In that time I grew up a lot and learn many things about myself. However, despite how prepared I thought I was when I finished my time in academia, life after graduation was a huge slap in the face. Here is what I have learned over the last several months of “the real world”.

The realities of budgeting money

It didn’t occur to me until I graduated that how hard it would be to responsibly budget my money and stick to it. Something I’ve been doing to force me to stay on a strict budget is to keep a money diary which is a feature offered by my bank. Something that I really wish had been an integral part of my college, or even high school, experience is a realistic idea of how to stick to a budget. This is something where unless you’re trying to get a degree related to finance, this may never be something you are ever exposed to. Luckily I was able to take a one credit online course during my senior year, but despite how that helped, having a regularly scheduled class in person would have been a better option for me. If you are still receiving an education and you have an option to take some sort of finance class, I highly recommend it. This can help open your eyes to what you should expect for yourself when you graduate and can help cushion the blow of sticking to a tight budget.

Student Loans

It doesn’t matter what stage of college you are in. You need to remind yourself of the realities of your student loan debt and how you are going to budget that into your life once you graduate. One thing that I’m really angry about is how little my university did to prepare students for the reality of paying back student loans. It wasn’t until I was having a casual conversation with my boyfriend about student loans less than a month before the first payment was due that I even realized there were certain options available for me for how to pay back student loans. My university had the students complete a “loan counseling” program but this could only help so much. Although it provides helpful information about student loans, I feel like my professors, especially those directly associated with my major, never had a real talk with us about student loans and what we could expect. My student loans are being paid back through an organization called MOHELA. I selected the option to pay back my loans in increments that would mean I will be debt free in ten years as long as I can keep up with all of my payments. It’s great that I won’t be in debt for the rest of my life but that’s still over $30,000 that I have to pay back. (it also doesn’t help that I’m not very satisfied with the education I received so……).

Theatre isn’t the highest paying job so the idea of paying back student loans is especially scary. I can honestly tell everyone that the thought of paying back my student loans makes me nauseous and has unfortunately driven me to one too many panic attacks because again, I am over $30,000 in debt at the ripe age of 23. No wonder people decide not to go to college so they can avoid this huge financial burden. I know I will be okay, but right now, the light at the end of the tunnel is hard to see. So far, everything has been going just fine, but it’s a huge thing to take on at such a young age.

Post-Grad anxiety

I freak out about being an actual adult about seven times an hour. I am always wondering if I picked the right major or whether or not I made a mistake. I wonder if I need to go back to school so I can be qualified for other work that will pay more money. At the end of the day, I was born to work in the performing and fine arts in some way. I’ve been involved with this since I was three and I can’t realistically see me doing anything else and being truly content. This is something that is very real and I don’t think enough people are open about it. Your life just went through a major change. You are no longer surrounded by your friends, you might be living in a different area, you are now in debt, and you have to figure out how to navigate jobs and other aspects of life. This is a huge lifestyle change and it is a huge adjustment. Yeah, I had a job right away but suddenly I was working with different people, in a different environment, with a ton of new responsibility I wasnt used to and I was scared. It’s something that weighed on me for a long time. Now that many months have gone by, I’m a lot more used to my life but I still have a long way to go. It’s going to be very scary but everyone goes through that. Your parents, siblings, grandparents, everyone has going through life feeling uncertain at times. You need to be open with yourself and others about what you’re feeling and never be afraid to ask for advice or what other people did to get through these feelings. You are not alone and you should never let yourself feel that way.

Job hunting

So I REALLY REALLY REALLY lucked out when it came to finding a job for after college. I was very fortunate to have a wonderful friend who advocated for me and helped me get an interview for the theatre at which I am currently working. On the subject of summer work, it has become clear to me that my university did a terrible job helping students think of and try to find jobs that weren’t at the summer theatre festival that is closely linked with the school. It wasn’t until my final year there that some professors actually took the time to introduce us to programs and theatre beyond our small bubble that we should consider. I didn’t branch out enough during college and looking back, I really wish i had. Everything happens for a reason and I am very blessed to have had the opportunities that built me into the stage manager today. However you need to take a chance on yourself and apply for multiple summer jobs. And this isn’t just for anyone who is in theatre reading this. Anyone going for any field needs to take this advice into consideration. Don’t do what I did and go the safe route. You are your own business and it’s up to you to take a chance on yourself. I will be the first to admit that I really lucked out with knowing the right people who have helped me get jobs so far. That’s what happened with my first professional job which then branched to my next summer job.

For all my friends still in college, I hope this one helps. Cheers!

Days On The Island…

I’ve started a snapchat series to log my life while practicing social distancing and here’s some of what I’ve come up with so far. I will continue to update as we go along with this pandemic. This series has been bringing a lot of joy to me and I hope it can bring some to you too.

March 18, 2020

March 18, 2020
I begin to lose it from lack of sleep

March 19, 2020

March 20, 2020

March 20, 2020

March 21, 2020

School Stress

Now that most people I know have been getting into the swing of a new semester, I want to talk about something that is constantly present in my life: school stress. Everyone experiences this because in school, especially college, you are expected to do so much at a high standard and sometimes it’s hard to keep up. I’ve had my fair share of breakdowns where I sob on the phone to my mom and then binge watch a RomCom on Netflix with a pint of Ben and Jerry’s and as I’ve grown as an adult and a student, I’ve discovered ways for me to manage this stress.

One of the biggest tools I use is lists. This is so simple and really makes a difference. When you have a lot to do in a short period of time, it feels like the world is spinning and is about to collapse on you. What I have learned to do is make a list of every thing I need to do, in order from what’s due first to last, and guesstimate how much time I think it will take me to accomplish each task. This way I can plan my days accordingly to what I think I will accomplish when. Then, I can cross everything off and that’s so unbelievable therapeutic to do!

Another great thing for me to do is vent my feelings to people. Sometimes all I need is to call my parents or my best friend and just freak out about what’s bothering me. They always give me good advice after and it’s nice to know that someone has listened and is sympathetic to what you’re going through. My mom is a teacher and sometimes when I get stressed while studying, she gives me good tips.

My mind wanders like you wouldn’t believe, especially when I try to go to sleep and when I’ve been particularly stressed during the day, I often struggle to sleep and get even more stressed. Something my roommate suggested is that I occasionally take a melatonin tablet when I struggle to fall asleep and it has made a huge difference in my life. Melatonin is the natural chemical in your brain that activates when you are tired and by taking a tablet of melatonin, you are kick starting this natural chemical and it helps you fall asleep faster. If I know I have a big day coming up, the night before I’ll try to get to bed early and take a meletonin and sleep like a log.

These are three things that have made a huge difference in my life. If you have tried any of these and have opinions to share, please do! Also, if you have any tips to help with stress, I’d love to hear about them!

Be Open to Love

This is an appreciation post for the man who pushes me to love myself every single day. And this is in no way saying that you need a man in order to validate your self-worth, but he is truly a catalyst in my journey to self love and self care physically, mentally, and emotionally. He is my coach in that when I’m down, he gets me to talk about it and helps me find a solution. And I can’t hide my feelings from him because he can always tell when something is wrong. I weighed less and had a lot less anxiety when we met and he loves me no matter what I look like or what state I’m in and I don’t know how I can ever show him how grateful I am to him for believing in me and loving me through every up and down in our relationship.

I went for so long thinking that I didn’t deserve love or that it was something that I could never have until I met Sam. We met at freshman orientation and after a hear and a half of friendship and us having painful crushes on each other, we finally started dating. These last two years have been some of the best of my life and I am so happy I allowed myself to love and to be loved. I love you, my potato.